Jacko Dies

Michael Jackson... the King of Pop and Controversies died today. After a number of conflicting news on the internet about his death, BBC and CNN finally confirmed his death at around 4:10 AM IST today. A very sad day for the fans of the legend. But for the rest of us a great sigh, "Now the children can sleep in peace".

In our darkest hour
In my deepest despair
Will you still care?
Will you be there?
In my trials
And my tripulations
Through our doubts
And frustrations
In my violence
In my turbulence
Through my fear
And my confessions
In my anguish and my pain
Through my joy and my sorrow
In the promise of another tomorrow
Ill never let you part
For youre always in my heart.

Rest In Peace Jacko Wacko!!.

In the middle of an autobiography

How do you sum your life?

Some judge it by the happiness they found in life. Some by the happiness others found in them.

I find the sum of my life by the failures and successes I have had, and I have enough of them both. Most of my successes have come without any effort and failures due to lack of effort (so that makes me a seriously lazy bum).

Since today morning a thought has been nagging me. I want to sum my life till now, to find out how much (rather if any) credit is left with me. Do I wanna know if I will go to heaven (now thats some real heavy crap!!)? Nah! Its just my waste-the-time-cells-from-my-brain working overtime. I love to daydream and these kinda daydreams are my passion - my wet dreams.

So here I am (on the urging of my waste-the-time-cells-from-my-brain) writing about the major failures of my life.

Lets get done with these, shall we?

  • I have never ever topped any exam, be it in the Kindergarten or Graduation. People say I have got potential but then people always say crap. What do they know about my potential!!
  • I have never ever been 'onsite'. If you are from the IT industry and have not been onsite then it is a serious deal dude. I mean real serious. What the hell is onsite? Onsite is the carrot which dangles in front of every software engineer and lures him to forget about the stick screwing his ass. Its the holy grail by which we s/w engineers swear.
  • I have never been associated with any of the so-called "world-famous in India" Institutions. I miss IITs, IIMs and St. Stephens from my CV. But then why work so hard for these three or four letters to be associated with your Qualifications column in your CV. Does anyone read these columns anyway?
  • Though I have always been in shape (round is a shape, don't u remember your elementary geometric?), I never had the sculpted body guys dream of. Every time Biwi pulls me up for this, I stand up, look at my toes and say "Sweetheart, abhi dilli door hai. I can still see my toes."
  • I had always longed for a "pony tail". Every time my hair grows beyond a certain level, something or the other comes up and I have to cut them short. The longest time I have tied back my hair has been for 2 days. I had to leave for my in-laws' place and had to prune my mane. Sari Khudai ek taraf, Joru ka bhai ek taraf. How could have I marred my bro-in-law's marriage for a silly pony tail?
  • Being of a medium height, I have never had the good fortune of having any nicknames like lambu or chotu. I envy people with such cute, short nicknames. Had my friends given me another nickname appropriately I would never have complained. Instead they came up with a gender changing "Pari". Sometimes I hate my friends
Hmmmm!! Looks like this post is turning out to be an ode to my failures. So be it. After all, "Failures are the pillars of Success". Will post on my success some time later. Till then dwell on my shortcomings and enjoy your fortunes!!

A Real Weekend

Last few days have been terribly busy for me... no, not bursting my ass at my workplace but having fun at home. I had a real weekend after a long long time. Wifey and I went shopping, watched movies, had great food and had loads of fun. It felt like heaven.

In these 3-4 days I found out a few interesting "timepass" things too:

I had always loved playing games but a new game which interested me after around 2-3 years is Mafia Wars. Its a game by Zynga, and I am playing it on Facebook. Though it has been just 4 days, I am loving it.

Biwi and I together finished the 2005 season of "Sarabhai Vs. Sarabhai". Its an awesome series and a must watch for anyone. We thoroughly enjoyed all the episodes.

School Days

Yesterday when I saw a topic in our School Community on Orkut, it was like the floodgate of memories has been opened. People were discussing their special moments from our school life.

I can't single out a moment from our school days as the best. I have loads and loads of special moments from school. It was with us for 12 goddamn years afterall!

I still remember the first day at school, all the kids crying and the nuns (or sisters as we used to call them) dragging them to the class, away from their parents. For some unknown reasons, I didn't even shed a single tear (was actually very excited as Maa tells me). Think I knew I was going to have some excellent times at the school.

Then I remember my first crush... Sajji Miss. She was an elegant lady and my heart skipped several beats when she passed around my desk. I know Class Three was a tad too early to be in love but... Dil to dil hai naa!!

Then there is the day (I think I was in the 5th standard) when I won my first quiz competition. Was a BIG deal for me... as you all know I was a good for nothing bum at school and to win some competition is always a big deal for guys like me.

I remember all the Picnics. Buying veggies and provisions the day before, waking up early in the morning to board the bus, playing antarakshari all the way, having fun at the venue and then coming back late in the night. I specially remember the picnics of 4th, 5th and 10th standards.

Teacher's day in the 10th Std was also special. We worked hard day and night to make it a success. The scandal that our industrious classmates created by embezzling the funds also helps me remember the occasion.

Getting suspended from school is never a good publicity exercise but I always feel proud to tell everyone I was suspended from the school for 3 days. I never tell the reason though for its triviality. Hope you guys also don't remember the reason and let my pride be. Though I was suspended later from DPS for various reasons, but still as they say.. First loves are never forgotten.

Then there is the day when I played the-innings-of-my-life in the opening cricket match against the "White" team. For an accomplished player like me(notice the sarcasm), it was a great moment of pride to be the architect of a win.

I specially remember the last days at school when we used to sit on the last bench and enjoy all day long. I remember the morning walks which turned into a 10 mile long jaunt. I remember sitting on the puliya in the evening and having some bhunja from Chotelal.

There were days when we didn't do anything special but still they are close to my heart as those were the days when we friends loitered around.

Oh! I am growing nostalgic now and before this post runs into pages I will stop .

India loose... Dhoni Old

Has the pressure of captaining Indian (or rather the BCCI) Cricket team taken its toll on the 'Captain Cool'? At 27 years 343 days Dhoni has become old... his hairs gray and spirit weakened. Yesterday, while watching the match there came a moment when I thought he looked so despondent. Last few days have been emotionally too heavy for him, what with all the controversies of a rift in the team and all. All these and some more have finally started to show their effect.

When they said Obama became old in a month after his inaugaration, I was sceptical. But after seeing this with our beloved Dhoni, I accept the prowess of media at everything including predicting new medical ailments.

Coming to yesterdays match, I think India had it coming for them. Being too arrogant has never been Indian team's virtue, but this team was slowly becoming one. The miff with media more than showcased the carefree attitude of these youngsters. The way they played yesterday only reiterated the point that they are begining to believe themselves as invincible, same as the Austrailian team. Anyways, being a true Indian fan that I am, I can dissect and analyse the reasons for long hours but can refuse the fact that I am going to lament this loss for a long time to come.

By the way, have you guys noticed that the sneaky bastard fakeiplplayer is back in business. So much for his I-will-vanish-after-the-IPL rhetoric!!

Is it just me shit scared or has the world gone to the dogs?

Everyday in the morning when I read the news paper, I see a lot of scary stories : a 75 year old guy killed his wife in front of his 7 year old grand kid; a 10 year old killed his friend because of a fight over a kite; a 14 year old rapes and then kills his 6 year old neighbor; a father rapes and imprisons his daughter for 30 long years. I mean, these are not stories out of some grotesque horror movies but these are happening amongst us, and real, living, breathing people are committing these horrendous crimes.

These little stories usually form up a small section in the 3rd page of the newspaper, the major portion dedicated to senseless news as to what chaddi is Dhoni gonna wear today or in whose cup size is the biggest in bollywood. But still somehow I manage to read them and reflect upon them. Shit!! I need to give up my habit of reading newspaper in the loo. Then environment is affecting my brains capability of sifting out shit from the good stuff.

Anyways, while we are at it, let me ponder upon some really shitty questions. Has the devil really bought up our souls? Are the doomsday stories a reality? Is the paap ka palda really becoming heavier than the sum total of punya on this planet? Will the Gods annihilate the world as we know becoming fed up with the sins we commit?

What the heck!!

Jaisa ki baba Shakespeare ne kaha tha… to smoke or not to smoke is the question. So much energy and paper is wasted every year to discourage people from smoking that it has become a major cause of global warming. So whenever I light up the cancer-stick(as the purists tend to call it) I think why do people smoke? Or rather as the post is mine, why do I smoke? Well, to be honest, I don’t know. I can give loads of excuses but the truth is that I don’t know.

I started smoking when I was in DPS, in 11th class. It was not peer pressure that initiated me. I experimented with it just because I wanted to do it. Well, it was one of the best feelings I had in my life, better than when I smoked weed or pot.

And before I knew what was going on I was addicted to it. I loved the feeling of being with my tanhai and sutta. When I went to college, I had many frnds becuz I smoked. They went on to become my best frnds for life. Till date we share a chai sutta whenever we meet.

My lovestory with my wife started bucuz she wanted me to quit. She felt that I had all the qualities of a gentleman except that I smoke and not chew ;).

So much has been the influence of a sutta in my life that I can’t imagine my life without it. Its not that I have not tried quitting. It has the distinction of being my sole new year resolution three years in running. Somehow or the other I end up taking a drag and then whoosh, its gone. The hazy blue cloud was too good to resist, for me.

I pondered upon the situation and came up with a few plausible reasons to help my cause of smoking :-

- You make frnds very fast when you smoke. I have met some of the best people of my life in the smoking zones. There is a great comaraderie between people who smoke, they form a sort of brotherhood or may be sisterhood (I have some gal frnds who smoke), hated and despised by everyone, they have a strong bond amongst them.

- Its easily available and at a very reasonable price. The merchandising and visiblity of the product is too good. You can be at the farthest corner of the earth (even where there is no Maruti Service Station or Reliance network) you will find a small shack which sells cigarettes.

- It is a good morning walk. I wake up early in the morning and go to the nearby paanwalla for a fag. I have kept the habit for last 9 years and I am fit as a fiddle.

- After supper I walk back to the panwalla and thus follow the old saying that “After meals rest for a while, after supper walk a mile”.

- Girls hate me when they come to know that I smoke. This decreases the insecurity level of my wife and thus prolongs my happy marriage.

- Its good to invest in the country’s economy. ITC Limited is one of India’s foremost private sector companies with a market capitalisation of more than US $ 15 billion and a turnover of US $ 4.75 billion. Do I need to tell that I smoke only Indian cigarettes?

I can rattle out a hundred such benefits of smoking but what the hell… I would rather go out and smoke a cigarette than preach its values to some infidels.

P.S. - This post is not a glorification of smoking but a personal reminder to me as to why I smoke and as they say Keep Walking….

[I am reposting one of my oldest posts just to show my despise for all kinds of atrocities being committed upon us smokers.]